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Sunday, October 10, 2010

The wisdom of no escape or the problem of boundaries

The great disadvantage to desire is that repetition kills joy. As our soul sees it, desire has no interest in wants to go deeper. It wants more intensity, more meaning, more expansion.

Desire that pursues its object while never gaining ground is stuck. A boundary acts like an invisible fence or a line that is not supposed to be crossed. Why do we put boundaries around our desires? First ,to keep out uncomfortable experiences. The second reason for putting boundaries is to protect your comfort zone.

Boundaries are made of frozen awareness, which is vey elusive to understand. In short , our boundaries are part of our identities. The soul can change that identity , and the process begins by negotiating with your boundaries. We know, in our heart of hearts, that we aren’t truly safe, protected, or fulfilled. If we want things to be real , several new assumptions come in to play.

You are not so afraid of risk. Taking a risk is the same as stepping outside your boundaries.
You don’t have to be right all the time. Being inside a limiting boundary is like being the ruler of a small island. you are in control, and the essence of control is always being right, not happy.

You trust that love is meant for you. Many kinds of boundaries hide self-judgement.people who reject intimacy feel that they don’t deserve love. They fear exposure , not wanting other people to see how unlovable they are. 

You welcome the opportunity to expand. People who live behind boundaries are suspicious of expanding. Human beings are unique in that expansion for us happens in awareness. 

You see abundance as natural to life. If you believe in scarcity, you cannot help but live in fear. inner lack is the real threat. 

You don’t expect anything. Nothing creates more unhappiness than failed expectations. If expectations don’t come true , the result is disappointment. In order to overcome expectations we can nurture the following attitudes in ourselves. 

We could be more centered.
We can let go of outcomes
We could take things less personally.
There is no need to dictate in advance what a good day could be.


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